This is the story of the day I stopped wanting to play boardgames with our friend Chris.I always thought it would happen first with his girlfriend Kim; she's not a very good sport when we play boardgames. She doesn't even wait until someone else wins. Often on the first turn if she perceives any slight to her gameplay strategy, it becomes personal.
Settlers of Catan
Carol: I rolled a 6...I get sheep!
Kim: I don't have any settlements with a 6...I hate you.
Power Grid
Carol: I'm going to buy this power plant
Kim: That's the one I was considering buying...I hate you.
Puerto Rico
Carol: Let's play Puerto Rico!
Kim: I always lose in that game...I hate you.
On the other hand, it is usually very enjoyable to play with Chris. There are two reasons for this: 1) he's always excited to play and maintains a happy upbeat mood throughout, and 2) he almost always loses because he's so busy enjoying himself he doesn't pay attention to strategy. He did actually win one time, and we were all very happy for him but I'm not going to lie, I win often and I enjoy that feeling (I should also mention that I once made the mistake of telling him this, as a compliment, and he was greatly offended. He didn't come by to play games with us for months after).
On Saturday, they came over to hang out and play games once the kiddies went to bed. Eric was multi-tasking and deploying some code or missiles or something upstairs on the computer, so we held off playing our current favourite game (Dominion, with multiple expansions) until he could join us. Instead, we opened up Blokus, an easy puzzle-type game with tetris-like pieces. The gameplay was simple, you just had to try to place as many of your pieces on the board as possible while blocking other players from placing theirs.
It turns out that Chris ROCKS at Blokus. It's a spatial visual game, and I guess his testosterone-fueled man mind kicked in and he easily won the first game. Eager and excited to chase that feeling, he readily agreed to a second game since Eric still wasn't ready to join us. The second time around, Kim and I were both better prepared and we blocked Chris far more effectively than before. Chris felt the resistance and became increasingly agitated, anxiety and excitement mingling with the desperate desire to feel that rush of winning again. As he struggled to break through one of my barriers to a wide open playing space, he got way too into it and exploded.
Chris: I WILL PENETRATE YOU!
A silence fell over the kitchen.
And I don't really want to play with Chris anymore.
