Happy

Spring is finally waking up, stretching and scratching her ribs and wondering what to make for breakfast. I look back on the winter that has just (mercifully) finally dragged his drunk ass off to bed, and it's hard to think of anything that sustained my emotions during that dark, bleak time (I don't like winter). After much thought, I came up with this:

A List of the Happies of My Average Winter Workday

or

The Things That Make Me Joyful Relative to My Standard State

(in Chronological Order)

7:30am - Hard to believe that there can be a highlight at this ungodly hour, but this is when I get in the car and sigh blissfully at the sound of P.Willy singing some cheesy broadway song on my cd player. I drive 5 minutes to work - that's usually one and a half renditions of AIAOY, or up to 2.3 renditions of Big Ass Rock, with some rewinding to listen to my favourite parts. I only listen to the soft slow quiet songs in the morning, because the loud fast songs are too jarring, and the truth is I'm not actually awake yet.

8:30ish - My co-worker Sophie comes to fetch me to make tea. She doesn't actually need the tea, but I do, because it means that we can sit in the servery for about 15 minutes waiting for the water to boil. Then she makes my tea for me, because she insists it tastes better that way. She's a good lady.

9:00ish - Depending on the day, this is around the time that my friend Jen comes online, and we discuss all things from gossip to science to poo. I really do like to talk about poo. I know as a certainty that this is a highlight of my day, because on the days that Jen doesn't show up, I am despondent and moody. Today may be one of those days and I'm not amused. Where are you, woman?

11:45 - This is the time to walk quickly walk quickly walk quickly....HAHA! Beat the rush for the microwave in the servery!!! If I arrive at noon, I have been known to have to wait in line for up to 25 minutes. I consider beating the microwave line one of the major accomplishments of the day, and I especially enjoy marching back to my room, clutching my tupperware in triumph, mocking people along the way who have unheated tupperware containers of food in their hands.

1:00ish - Time to eat my apple! Whooo apple!

3:15 - HOMETIME!! I celebrate this moment by inquiring of the man across from me in a gross and creepy voice "Guess what time it is??" I do this every day.

5:00ish - The moment that I hear Eric's key in the door, I get EXTREMELY happy. Understand though, that this moment lasts about 4 seconds. Because once he enters the condo, I'm actually annoyed that he's speaking to me and trying to kiss me with his gross public transit lips, and interrupting whatever television program I'm watching. I'm kind of a bitch when I stop to think about it.

7:00-9:00 - If there is an episode of CSI I haven't seen yet on Spike, I get really excited. If however, there is an episode that I've already seen, my life falls into listlessness. It's really a toss-up between 7:00 and 9:00.

10:00 - I love climbing into bed, the cool fresh sheets caressing my flannel-swathed overweight body, the open balcony door letting in a cool fresh breeze. I read my book for a little while.

10:30 - Snuggletime! Eric is uber cuddly!! If you think this is a euphemism for doing the sex, you're sadly wrong. If there is actually any doing of the sex, it's not a highlight, it's more of a drain on time and energy, and then the next day if we're tired, it gets blamed on the sex. We've become too practical for bedtime sex, and one of us (usually Eric) is complaining the whole time anyway, so it's like resentful sex, and who wants to have that? So we snuggle and drift off to sleep. Or as I like to call it, sneep.

10:45ish - The happy that starts the day is much the same as the happy that ends the day. As I drift off to sneep, visions of a singing P.Willy dance in my head. Naked.