Random bits of general confusion

I've been assailed with complaints, and I apologize for neglecting the blog. I've been unceremoniously jerked into oceans of guilt, with the return of ThePeach. ThePeach went on blog-hiatus a fortnight ago because of a break-up with her boyfriend. They are now reunited, and she has started blogging again. I just happened to stop blogging about two weeks ago and haven't been able to think of anything good to write. But now that she's started blogging again, I'm feeling especial pressure. That, and the threatening msn messages from angry friends. Thank you, angry friends.

There's nothing happening. Well, no. There are some things happening, but nothing is particularly interesting or bloggable. But here are the random bits, pushed out due to high pressure and guilt.

The Gym Does Nothing
We've been going to the gym for three weeks, and I'm tired and I still weigh a million pounds. Okay, so three weeks isn't a very long time. And even if my weight hasn't gone down, my stomach is a little less blorpy than it used to be, and my jeans seem to be fitting oh so very slightly looser. So I suppose that's progress. I wish I had money and time off so I could get extensive lyposuction.

Battlestar Galactica Has Ruined My Life
Season 3 doesn't air until October, and I need to know what happens. The end of Season 2 was crazy messed up, and if Starbuck and Apollo don't get together soon and screw each other so hard they bruise all over, I'm going to throw myself off the condo balcony. I'm also upset that I'm not a viper pilot protecting a ragtag fleet from cylon invaders. Stupid SAP ABAP HR programming, what the hell kind of career is that?

I Broke Up With P.Willy
And I'm so over him! I still think he is awesome and a half. But the wave of obsession has been wiped out - by another wave of obsession...

I Heart Jamie Bamber and Katee Sackhoff
A.K.A. Apollo and Starbuck. Jamie Bamber has a crazy wicked body, and has a British accent in real life. Katee Sackhoff is so unbelievably cool, and Starbuck kicks everyone's ass. Unfortunately, Jamie Bamber is married with three small daughters. Equally unfortunately, Katee Sackhoff is a girl, and neither of us are lesbians. Luckily, none of this matters in my head.

Eric Turned 25
And his car insurance went down.

We Cleaned the Condo
And holy gross, we had a ton of dust! In fact, I made a great joke at my in-laws house on Easter Weekend...

MIL: Did the Easter Bunny visit you this weekend?
Me: No, but I think the Dust Bunny did!
Everyone: Mwafwafwafwafwa!!

We Got a New Mattress
The first one they sent us had a lopsided corner on the pillowtop, and we didn't like that, so Sleep Country sent us another one as a replacement. Now according to my friend Rob, I will be reincarnated as a South African child in my next life, with no mattress at all, as punishment for my materialistic pickiness and wasting a perfectly good mattress. Rob is an halfie environmentalist hippie accountant who refuses to take Tylenol when he has a headache. I don't take anything he says seriously.

We Went to The Dentist
And the hygienist told me that Eric makes a lot of saliva.

And that's about it. No real goals, no sense of purpose, just aimless existence. I will end with a dejected haiku.

Life is dull, I'm bored.
Battlestar Galactica...
Frakkers ruined my life